Hello lovely readers! I hope that this newsletter finds you in good spirits; if that feels like too much of a reach, then I hope that you are able to find ease and comfort in your day. I’ve been looking forward to mulling over the word pertaining to this newsletter edition’s mini essay for a couple months. I had saved the photo that sparked the idea in my favorites, knowing that I would return to it when the time was right. I hope that it inspires you throughout the month and into the new year. Thank you for reading and being here! I love hearing from you, so if you feel so inclined, please drop me a line.
JOY: the emotion evoked by well-being, success, or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires. The expression or exhibition of such emotion. A state of happiness or felicity. A cause or source of delight. (Source: Merriam-Webster)
Every now and then, a radical thought pops into my head and if I’m with a friend when it happens, I’ll recount it to them: “What would it look like if we filtered all of our decisions through the lens of joy?”
During my Paris trip in September, I visited the fashion museum Palais Galliera to check out an exhibit called La Mode En Mouvement. Inspired by the upcoming Olympic and Paralympic Games that will be held in Paris next summer, the exhibition chronicles the history of fashion from the 18th century through present day, highlighting 200 or so pieces of clothing. It was a fascinating way to glimpse the impact that fashion has had on sports and vice versa, and clothing’s relationship to the body and how it moves through the world, not just in the physical sense, but how it moves through society and the cultural norms of its time. I really loved the curated items that accompanied the garments, especially this Chanel surfboard (pictured below).
Near the end of the exhibit there was a cool collection of sneakers and opposite it, shirts and jerseys. I was drawn to the sweatshirt simply emblazoned with More Joy, from designer Christopher Kane’s Fall-Winter 2018 collection, which was partly inspired by the book The Joy of Sex. I can see a direct through line therein; isn’t so much of joy about pleasure and desire? But I like to think of ‘more joy’ as also including a sense of hopefulness and general well-being.
Why does it feel radical to think about seeking more joy? Why can’t we? What is stopping us? Is it because we feel guilty about going after something we think we deserve? Is it clouded over by the fact that we often put others’ well-being ahead of our own? Even if we obtain the emotion of joy or a state of happiness, we often don’t give ourselves permission to fully express or exhibit joy or to celebrate our delight.
When I started physical therapy for my back a couple weeks ago, I was asked, among the typical intake questions, about what I liked to do for fun. I didn’t answer right away; I’m guessing this question gives most people pause, so the therapist pressed on with,“If you had two weeks to do anything, what would you do?” He even helpfully supplied “travel?” since I had told him I am a food and travel writer. Sure, having the opportunity to travel is high on the list of things that make me happy, but my initial non-response signaled that I’d lost sight of what brings me joy on a day-to-day basis. As we approach a season that is about maximalist joy in many respects, I’m going to turn the lens of seeking more joy on myself before I think about how I give and bring joy to others.
What does more joy look like for me? It is time to linger over a second cup of hot coffee, still in sweatpants after school drop-off, while I finish the New York Times games and puzzles. It’s sneaking in 20 minutes of afternoon TV viewing to catch up a bit on Saturday Night Live and belly laughing during the cold opens. It’s a second glass of Prosecco at a holiday party and feeling gratitude for my friends and creative community. More joy also takes the form of sitting on the porch on a warmish winter day, admiring the bare branches of the stately walnut tree in our backyard while listening to the creek trickling past. More joy is taking myself on an artist’s date, like viewing the incredible Swoon exhibit at the Taubman Museum of Art (a photo of an immersive part of the exhibit is pictured above).
More joy is cooking a batch of soup and ladling up bowlfuls to share with my mom for lunch. More joy is snuggling with my husband as we enjoy a TV show that we both actually want to watch (All the Light We Cannot See and Welcome to Wrexham were recent favorites). It is ice cream sundaes and movie-watching with my daughter and a relaxing weekend of lounging while cozied up in matching holiday jammies. More joy is writing this newsletter, giving myself the gift of sitting with my thoughts and sharing my words with others.
As I reflect on the past year and start planning for next year, I want to hold on to the notion of ‘more joy’ not just in my way of being, but my way of working too. I want to find more joy in my work by redefining what success looks like and remembering the sense of discontentment that can settle in all too quickly when I pursue projects that are out of alignment with my heart’s desire, such as my memoir.
So how can you seek more joy? Once you identify the small things that bring you joy, a pattern will start to emerge and serve as a guide. For me, that is being present with and spending time with loved and cherished ones, carving out time to be still and alone, and creating more opportunities for play and rest. Think about what would bring you more delight, more pleasure, more well-being, more bliss, then seek it out. I’m wishing each one of you more joy this holiday season and beyond.
Memoir Updates
A few more query rejections have rolled in, so I’ve updated my spreadsheet: 47 queries sent, 18 rejections. As I mentioned in the last couple newsletters, I’m taking a pause from querying agents and returning to revising my manuscript. I’m trying to temper my achievement-driven angst by reassuring my writer ego that my manuscript will still be waiting for me in the new year, and that now is a time to bank rest and recharge my creative batteries. I love the pattern play on part of one of the Swoon pieces on exhibit at the Taubman (pictured below) and I want to use it as a writing prompt!
Published Articles & Media Appearances
The Secret Ingredient Your Holiday Cheese Board Needs
This is one of my favorite stories I’ve written for Food Network this year, inspired by a mind-bendingly delicious bite I had after a cheesemaking workshop at Paroles de Fromagers. I promise that adding this secret ingredient will change the way you build your cheese boards at home, and it might even incite some fierce debates as it’s been known to do in France.
For Edible Blue Ridge’s Local Heroes issue, I interviewed Anna Prillaman about Twin Creeks Distillery, her family’s third-generation moonshine business in Rocky Mount, Virginia. The scope started about their impact on the community and how much the family has done to preserve moonshine history in the area, but it evolved in real time to capture how the community rallied around them to help them in their direst moment of need.
Books, Bites & Beverages
Books: I just finished reading the English version of The Little Prince with my daughter Ava, who described it as “good, a little weird, and funny.” It’s inspired me to start re-reading my copy of the original French edition, Le Petit Prince, which I’ve had since my French college class days. There are always wonderful lessons to glean from its pages and I love how it stokes the power of imagination for the reader to take with them long after they’ve set the book down.
Bites: It’s definitely soup and stew season in our house, and my husband has made this homey Guinness beef stew (pictured above) a couple times now. He originally hails from England so beef stew is one of his all-time favorite dishes, but one he hadn’t tried making until recently. I’ll make my version (sans Guinness, a little thicker broth) sometime in the coming weeks, along with Yorkshire puddings (think of them like an American popover meets a French gougère, or a sort of savory puff for dipping, scooping, and mopping).
Beverages: It’s also peak hot chocolate season around here so I joined my daughter in a mug topped with whipped cream while watching weekend cartoons, and we also met friends out for an annual hot cocoa tradition at Chris’s Coffee & Custard. It’s an especially cool spot because it creates employment opportunities for people with special needs, like the shop’s namesake, Chris Woodrum, who has Down Syndrome. And this time of year they have lots of fun Christmas trees and decorations throughout the space! This is Ava in one of her festive holiday outfits in front of the tree and a life size Nutcracker figurine.